You never know what that person had gone through just 10 minutes before.....
I know I am not regular in writing, but sometimes I feel. I should write (regularly. I will be consistent from now.... PROBABLY) and express my feelings. I was thinking about what should I write or spend my time upon? So, I came up with an idea. Let's start writing about the lessons I learned from her.
I learned many lessons from her (still learning). I will be sharing all of them one by one. Starting with one of my favourites:
'When you call someone, or you suddenly meet someone, you never know what that person had gone through just 10 minutes before you met or you called him/her.'
We were discussing a random topic (Random for her. I was on my way to building solid content from it.), then she spoke the above words. When I listened to them, I was like. What made her think like that? How should I take it? Is that a general statement? Is it something she had gone through? Although, I never dared to ask her. I took it in a way I could understand better.
I was overthinking those words, which were absolutely true. We don't know someone's past. Not even past 10 minutes. But should we consider it while having a conversation? There are many situations when we crave attention. We have a mentality that we should be entertained first. In many circumstances, we choose our comfort over someone's feelings. We have to always speak out all unpleasant things to others without even thinking of them.
Many times we (Indians) are unhappy with government servants because they are not in place. We always blame them. But the officer might have some kind of illness, and we don't think of it. In the same way, the government employee doesn't think of what the person had gone through and what urgency they have, but they just see their comfort or choose laziness. We face this same issue in our personal life too. When you are chatting with your friend, talking to your mom & probably in every conversation we have.
We interact with friends, family, relatives and strangers daily. Do we consider another person's past? And if you do. Like You are not thinking about yourself. You aren't going to talk about what's on your mind just because you care for that person's feelings? The answer to all questions is No. We are not going to consider other person's feelings. We are just gonna talk about what we always wanted to without even thinking. We all are just attention seekers. We always wanted all to listen to us. We have the right to speak, so we never bother to think about how another person would feel. We never consider this, is a person in the mood to listen.
Think of it. We never know someone's past. Not even past 10 minutes. We never try to understand what that person is going through. One of our friends may want some space for some time. He is not receiving the call or not responding to chats. Avoiding the conversation. In this situation, we always say that he is showing attitude. And we all fail here as a friend.
And you know some people give us space. They think about and for us. They put effort to understand us. They give time to relationships so that we can overcome the feeling. They always speak with a smile so the other person will have a few moments of happiness. They listen to you and pay complete attention to your words. They try to energise you. They will you with positivity.
What can we do to know someone's past? Should we ask him that how were your past 10 minutes? Absolutely not. We can start a conversation with were you busy with some other work? is it the correct time to talk? Or we can give them some time to switch their past to present conversation. And this way we can have effective communication. We can understand people better if we can listen to them.
Let us stop this discussion for now... I will reach you soon with another lesson I learned from her... Please don't make an effort to know who is she. See you in the next blog.